Okay so raise your hand if you’re bored of seeing all of the goodie lists of the year or the year’s past?  It’s easy to say what we all want to see but how many of us are man enough (or woman) to tell the world what we don’t want?  I should see quite a few hands but if not, I’m still going to rain down the thunder.

This list is what I don’t want to see or hear or be any part of this year.  So I’m hoping that the people in the gaming world take note because I don’t want to direct my forces of rage at you if you are responsible for anything from this list.

Mr. Spandy’s I Don’t Want List

1. Sonic remakes (unless you can guarantee me stock or residuals). Please don’t abuse the blue-haired hedgehog any longer.

2. 1200 or 1600 Microsoft Point slaps in the face for the XBLA.  Seriously, is the XBLA not meant for quick, affordable fun anymore?  I gotta call my financial advisor first for some of these games.

3. RROD stories.  It’s not a surprise anymore and no, you’re not the only one so please spare anyone your red ring of death story.  Just send the damn thing in for repairs and deal with it.

4. VGA shows.  Seriously Spike TV.  It’s bad enough you’re pimping the last bit of decency out of Geoff Keighley.  Get some gamers on this “game awards show” and maybe I’ll reconsider.

5. Rushed sequels.  If I see a Gears of War 3 this year I may just slap Cliffy B (yeah I called him that).  If the problems in Gears 2 don’t scream “take your friggin’ time” I don’t know what will.

6. Multiple expos.  What’s the point?  None of them show you anything of any importance that the other won’t.  Somebody, anybody…consolidate all the Penny Arcade Expo’s, the E3’s etc.

7. Celebrity developers.  For every Denis Dyack, Cliffy B, Peter Molyneaux and Itagaki, there’s a little less of me going down the toilet.  We know you make good games (most of you do anyway).  Shut up and just make them.

8. Console wars.  How old is this really?  Can the big 3 just leave each other the hell alone without tossing insults in the media that PR tries to spin it into not reading like insults but we all know they’re insults.

9. Movie games.  Batman: Arkham Asylum and X-Men Wolverine Origins might be exceptions but please kill the idea.  Kill the belief that you must have a game for every movie released.  They do more harm than good usually.

10. TV show games. Deadliest Catch Alaskan Storm should say it all.

11. Raping of Collector’s & Limited Edition contents. I don’t want screenshots or some art or anything from the internet.  I want something I can actually collect or say is limited.  Most “limited” editions are still being sold so how limited are they really? Make that extra $10 or $20 worth something.

12. Hiding content for charging later. This is the dumbest strategy around. If you charge me, don’t charge me for unlocking what’s already on the game disc.  Yes, games are expensive to make.  But us little old consumers don’t get Christmas bonuses for buying multiple games like you guys do for making them.

I think that’s enough for now don’t you?  I could go on but the list would seriously break the RSS feed.  This has been the I Don’t Want List of 2009.  Agree?  Don’t agree?  Whatever.